This is fucked. Harry Boucher (above) was 15 at the time when last September local nob head Martyn Dashwood aged 32 got involved in a skatepark argument, dropped a haymaker on the lad and knocked him unconscious. Then he stamped on him before exiting the park with this gem: “I’m Martyn Dashwood, I’m in the Mafia, you shouldn’t mess with me.”

Martyn Dashwood is now serving 12 weeks for his attack on Harry, where he’ll spend Christmas at Her Majesties pleasure with no hair gel and rationed cigs. Lets see Tony Soprano get you out of this one mate.

Shout out to Harry for having to go through this ordeal. We’ll try to maintain our journalistic integrity by keeping this clean, but we really hope Dashwood’s backdoors look like a butchers window when he leaves prison.