MIni moto’s, bristol and a red skull

Posted on August 14, 2007 @ 8:59 PM

Listen up primates, just into my second week of summer holidays now. the weekend just gone was a belter. Started out on saturday night when ex bmx-er john hogg invited me to a party which was slightly different to your average get together. He told me it would be a few mates a dj ,bbq and a few drinks. what he didnt tell me was i was invited as a contender to an actual game of real life road rash, for anyone that doesnt remember, road rash was a sega mega drive game where contenders would take part in a motorbike race with no rules( i.e cheating and hitting each other) the winner would obviously be the last person still standing. well this race was just like that only worse. it was held in a field where a large course was made and lots of mini 110cc moto x bikes where there for all to use. no sooner had i arrived when a helmet was forced on my head by the loud mouthed bully and announced i was on next. with no time to even look at the track of eye up my competition the race was on. people were cheating from the start line and everyone was on the floor driving over each other trying to get into pole position. then came the catch. to cross the finish line and carry on with the next lap you had to filter through a bar and down a shot of sambuca. needless to say things got messy after 6 or 7 laps. i got ran over by a moped, vin diesel lookalike ted knox got t-boned by a moped which smashed the engine apart, a fat chick crashed a moped into a crowd of people, a mini moto bike was burnt as a sacrifice to the mini moto gods. about another half a dozen where wrote of and then to fonish it off hogg smashed in his mates vw gold by driving it into a tree stump. surprisingly the tree won so a motorbike was picked up and thrown through the window. later that night i ended up in a night club full of dirty women on a hen night. one of the ladies must of been the great great great gran and decided to have a dance with me and wierd sam. she must have been knocking on for 90 no word of a lie. what a night.

    sunday came and i was back on the road to do a bit of riding with the old red skull himself, rhys mcfleece. after arriving early i was taken to the river avon to catch some guaranteed heavy fish. apparently you cant fail to catch in this river. well i avoided a blank by the skin of my teeth and a few perch saved the day. as i sat waiting for the big one a dude on a bmx came over and turned out was a mate of the red one. so the rod was packed away and forced onto my bike. later on we were joined by mc fleece and bullied into riding for some BS3 video clips. as normal i produced shit and the back doors got kicked in trying to (as the cool kids say) shoot bee's up some steps. i did muster a half bar which for anyone who doesnt know,much better than a full. remember less is more. after we shut down the mean streets of bristol a few cans got downed and was forced once more into pulling three tricks in a row. as a reward i got 2 pints of black rat or something. what ever it was it did the trick. im back homw now and off to grimsby or barrow next. some summer holiday eh... ovr and out tossers......n.j

 

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